I am being such an update whore because this is my new toy… and there are a million tiny hamsters fueling the greasy creaky wheel in my head, where craziness errupts.

I started to read Kant, and I couldn’t help asking “What is so mysterious about morality?” I do appreciate its value in inspecting human motivations, agency, and activity. However, I don’t think that it IS a big motivator… something that should be digged… I don’t even think it (moral law) exists as something concrete and formal.

Basically, I think that this site is going to be a compilation of my multifaceted non committal ramblings about anything and everything.

So, the run down on my shitty tuesdays is that it is always not as bad as I think it is going to be. My class where the professor answered my question wasn’t that bad. My media class where I had to come up with 5 game ideas, wasn’t that bad. In fact, for that class, I almost end up being on top of things. I always feel like a nerd / over achiever afterwards in a way where it makes me feel like a dork.

I was talking to this classmate of mine today, where he made this self depreciating comment about how my ideas will dazzle and embarrass his less than par ideas. This wasn’t true, but this compliment horrified and flattered me at the same time. Is that how they view me? This smart ass suck up? It’s such a shock, because in the philosophy department I always manage to feel like a flake at least couple of times a day. Mmm.

I do believe that feeling like a flake is an important part of developing the neuroses that are a requirement for being a crazy professor. I also feel that that feeling is an important marker to show that you are learning / growing… however unpleasant it may be. It is the equivalent to reading past journal posts and cringing… hoping and knowing I will never do/write/feel/whatever again.

The stupid thing about tearing myself away from BOB (my desktop) and going to bed, is that I have a portable notebook computer at my disposal. Ultimately, I feel the need to check the new site out in mac and safari. (and it utterly looks like ass. ASS. (what is a designer to do? I need to some up with something much better)) This means, not actually going to sleep.
This to do for this site:
1) come up with a design that works
2) create static “about pages.”

Ok. I have to get ready for my shit tuesday (cause every tuesday is a full day of classes). I need to get my videogame proposals in order.

I spent most of Sunday and a lot of tonight tweeking this site. This is very enjoyable and fun for me. (what a geek) However, it’s terrible for the reading and work I was suppose to do.

My philosophy reading on Nietzsche’s Geneology of Morals should have been done awhile ago. Also, I was having a brain fart and actually interacted/emailed the teacher several questions. This drove him to suggest that we explore one of them during class… god forbid that I participate. What was I thinking? Hopefully I don’t make too much of an ass out of myself. Errr… hopefully I can a sufficient amount of reading done to situate myself sufficiently.

These are stupid stupid things.

I’m currently doing this internship, where we are developing templates for the students at my school so that they can create dynamic websites that communicate with the server without risking the school servers. This is why I was scouting out “Content Management Systems” in php, in order to get familiar with the type of things we will be doing (read this as: attempting to do) during my internship.

Reopening this blog/journal was something that happened because of this testing of content management systems. I basically saw wordpress and saw something that was perfect for this site, something that was the perfect tool for me. In fact, I think I like it better than movabletype. (fine, the thing I love best is that it is really actually opensource. non tech savy people can read that as “free.”) I really like what I see. It’s easy to customize, navigate, and to install. I also like that it doesn’t have too much going on like geeklog. (I also installed this on my server to test it out for a group blog I work on.) Well, in geeklog‘s defense, there’s is a portal, while this is more of a journal/blog publishing orgnization system.

Thank’s to wordpress, I got my drive back for restarting this site. Let’s hope that this system continues to dazzle me with simple “contentment.”

update: 2am. Getting the layout/template up was annoying. I’m just not good with templates. It’s working for the most part… kinda.

I still adore the admin interface of this thing.